When I started going to other people's houses, I saw the differences in how I grew up and how they grew up. It was then a sense of ‘otherness’ set in. I would have welcomed the opportunity to meet people like me. Those with experience of care. Not to wallow, but to have fun. To build connections through casual conversations about our experiences. A space to be open, to stop hiding and feeling like the only one.
It's harder to access things but you're not completely shut off. It's been hard for me to open up but it feels like everything is on display.
My counsellor is the greatest dude. When I started seeing him I still had my mum's voice in my head blaming me for things. He helped me check my feelings and I knew he was on my side. Almost everyone who goes through the care system has trauma. Offer us mental health support.
I spent 10 years taking drugs. I was always out of school and hanging out with older people. My family was a recipe for disaster and school was hard. I needed an escape and there wasn't one. My drug and alcohol worker only offered support for abstinence and it wasn't relatable. We need role models who are likes and can speak to us on our level.
No one knows what’s happening on the other side of the wall. As we say in Lambeth ‘Reach for the stars’.
A message for other care experienced people: Your seat at the table might be upside down but you're capable of turning it around. A message for policymakers: Sit us down, and listen. Don't hinder opportunities for care experienced people.
It’s important to seek out peace and be humble. Within the care system we all have issues with social services and it’s not always going to go your way, but if you work with people it’s peaceful. It’s hard to let people in, but you have to try to trust professionals so you can help yourself.
It's hard to take the first steps to better mental health. I always knew I suffered from mental health issues but there was no access to support. Through the GP I had to wait months and months. When I was busy thinking about where my next meal is going to come from, I couldn't look that far ahead.
Being under the Mental Health Act was a wake-up call to put myself my first. I was always that person making sure everyone was alright, but I’ve learned to focus on myself. It’s not a selfish thought, you have to do it. There wasn’t something ‘mentally’ wrong with me, I needed emotional support. Having people around to talk to makes such a difference.
When I was 16 my social worker told me I was too old for a fostering placement, and that I wouldn’t survive in a children’s home. My neighbour agreed to be a temporary guardian. That was the last interaction I remember with any social worker. At 18 I really needed help, but didn’t know who to turn to or where to go. Attempts to make contact with care leavers should continue so we know where to turn to when in need.
One day someone might pick you up from school, take you away and you won’t know if you're ever going home. Once I was placed in South London. Every morning I would get on the P12, and then the 148 and then the 52 to get to primary school in West London. It took two hours, and I would travel on my own. Children should be placed in their area for safeguarding and to have reasonable access to education.
“My journey looked a little different to those around me. I’d switch between environments and it would create obstacles of all shapes and sizes. When you get taken into care you're separated from everything. Parents, belongings, anything that feels familiar. There should be immediate wellbeing support available to young people adjusting to unknown care homes and returning to the houses they were taken from. ”
“Mental health is unique to everyone. To understand the case, you need to understand the individual. My mother had the same Social Worker for 18 years. He was alert to changes in her behaviour, and took action. Early intervention helped to keep my mum stable, supported and safe for long periods. This kept me out of the care system.”
Music is my escapism. It gives me confidence and I can't live without it. It stimulates me for my career in the entertainment industry. We all need to find something we're passionate about and build it up. Encourage us, help us follow our passions and provide necessities and funding to help us pursue them. Personal advisors shouldn't look into past experiences, they should help us look into the future because it's spotless.
Moving into my flat wasn’t easy but it wasn’t hard. It was a rocky road knowing you’re going to start a whole new journey all over again. Especially knowing myself in the big world we live in. Moving was the light at the end of the tunnel.
Sometimes you have to look at the bright side. Ultimately, I am no different from any other young person and just want to be happy.
These are very special to me, because they were my brother's. Family. Has always been important to me but moving from foster home to foster home makes it hard to stay in touch. When I moved out of foster care and back with my parents, I was no longer in care and had no support from social services with sibling contact, making it hard for my brother and I to stay in touch.
Losing a sibling having just come out of care is the hardest thing I have ever experienced. If I didn't have support from the charity 'Voices from Care', I don't know where I'd be right now. I don't do well with grief. Care-experienced young people often experience negative mental health issues and haven't always had the family help to learn how to cope with these. When we prepare to leave care, services need to remember that its not just the practical side of things we might need support with.
Somewhere I can go , Sit down, relax, Switch off from adults and their questions. Nobody ever looks forward to moving, why would you?
Care-experienced young people have the right to continue with education if they choose to, in order to get a good job. I want to study veterinary nursing next year, I have wanted to do this since I was six years old. Young people leaving care need more information on where to get support for continuing with further education and help with budgeting for this so they too can study independently.
I will be in care for another seven years and seeing my mum and brother is really important to me. Every weekend, I walk for one and a half hours to where they live so that I can spend time with them. Just because you don't live with your family doesn't mean that it's not important to have regular contact with them.
A 'home' is more than four walls, more than simply a house. When I left care, I was told how to furnish a house - it was dictated to me by my advisor what I could spend my budget on. But a house full of things doesn't make a home.
Being in care can feel like a lot of restrictions. It can push young people to want to live independently. But we don’t always have realistic expectations of what this is actually like. The realities of moving out of care can come as a big shock - living independently can be hard, it can be lonely and isolating. More guidance and support given with an open mind from social services, could better prepare young people for the challenges that independent life as an adult has to bring.
Because I lived with different foster carers, I didn't have much time with my brother. I will always miss him. Social services need to try and keep siblings together and support us to keep contact when we transition out of care , otherwise we wont have that relationship once we have left.
The bare essentials sometimes mean the most to us, especially when we have had to live without them. We all need light and love to be able to function, it's not wealth that helps us to live well in life.
This bear is twenty years old - he was given to me by my best friend, my dad. His name is Mr. Nightnights. Mr. Nightnights is my rock, he's been through everything with me and he's travelled the world. My best friend brought him to the hospital when I was ill because she knew that I needed him with me. At 24 we're considered 'adult', we're told we no longer need support but everyone needs support it doesn't matter what stage you are in life.
Sometimes I feel like I have been left alone. When I left care, the support stopped, just like that. I hardly went out because I was new to this the area. I didn't have friends - it was pretty isolating.
Young people leaving care have the right to a 16+ worker who should help prepare them for their future independent life - this must include young people in kinship care or parental guidance care. Often social services pull back from cases of young people in kinship care and give them less support but being in any type of care and having court cases going on can be hard and young people in kinship care can face problems just like those in foster or other types of care. I want to advocate and put my views across so that there is a change and there is awareness around kinship care - this way. kinship care experienced young people can deal with their problems and get on in life.
All my life, I have felt like I'm falling and I have felt like I had to keep moving. Care leavers need stability, they need a place to call their home so that they can thrive in life.
You can't always change what has happened in your past but you can always make your future stronger and better.
When you're in care, you have mixed emotions which can lead to a negative mindset which can stay with you for life. We need to remember that we can all feel comfortable, content and loved. Everything is possible when you believe in yourself and believe in the life you can have.
We are all the same on the inside - care-experienced and non care experienced young people. There is a misunderstanding that we need extra help in education but this isn't always the case. Don't assume - ask us what support we need.
I had no say in my life until I turned twenty-one and was told I was an 'adult' and no longer in care. Though I wasn't prepared at the time, becoming independent has given me more choices over my life and I'm now free go wherever I want. Corporate parents and social workers should trust is and give us the freedom and support to plan our own futures.
Love can come from many places, its not only through families. Care leavers should be supported to find love and their identity in things that make them feel good - hobbies, nature, friendships. Through these things, we can learn to love ourselves. In this way, love really has no boundaries.
Something so simple can get lost so easily. Not being able to travel makes me feel out of control. When you're in care, you feel like people control your life and all you want is freedom. But then you leave care and you get all of that control back,. Your realise its not easy, that control comes with responsibility that perhaps you weren't prepared for
The four pillars in life that we need are power, stability, good health and supportive relationships. These come from solid foundations, often from family support. Young people leaving care just need some extra help in making these possible.
Friends can have a really positive impact when you're having a hard time but It's difficult to get to know people when you move around foster placements. Now that I'm no longer in care and live independently, it can be really lonely. I feel I could be better supported to meet new people and form friendships so that I have that support network.
When I get my own home, I'd like to live in the countryside where it's peaceful and where you can hear the birds. At the moment, I'm seventeen and I' not ready to live on my own - it seems pretty lonely. It's hard to say how I'll feel when I'm twenty-four and considered an 'adult'.
My friends don't even know I'm in care. I tell them another story. If they knew, they'd ask too many questions. I would just like to be treated equally - they same as other young people.
Care-experienced young people often have mental health issues that they need to manage with medication. This can come from a lack of stability in their lives which has lead to a negative mindset, which often gets worse when things change as they move out of care. Family, friends, personal advisors and social services all have the potential to play an important role in supporting young people's positive well-being.
If I don’t take my tablets, it can have serious consequences. Past trauma as a child has meant I have struggled with becoming an adult. I know w my battle with mental health issues wont ever disappear, but with the correct support, it could become easier.
At age 13 I feel like I'm at a crucial point for laying foundations for the future. It's important to focus on school as we've just chosen our GCSEs. It's important to have positive role models but so often people are using negative examples to motivate them. I'm glad I have people around to aspire to.
This is my room where I love to relax and chill. If you’re feeling stressed out it’s good to take a break alone to calm down.
This photo represents my favourite thing to do - I really enjoy it. My Carer bought me the console as a Christmas present, because she’s so lovely.
When I was 18 and began moving out of care, I feel like I was forgotten by social services and the Government. Now I battle with mental health issues and alcohol misuse. Today, I have to take 7 tablets each day because of the consequences of this. This isn't good enough - young people who may have experienced trauma deserve specialist mental health support services as they transition into independent life.
The Government is supposed to help us, not forget us. We are care-experienced but we should be treated as humans, the same as other young people. Not just as statistics or numbers in a database.
My foster mum is very supportive, listens to my opinions and voices it to the necessary people. I'm treated like a member of the family which allows me to forget that I have experience with care. It's important to be able to trust each other.
I fell into alcohol misuse when I left care - I drank to pass out, I drank to forget my past traumas. It's an ongoing struggle but as I'm not getting the support I missed out on during this time, this part of my life is slowly fading away as it becomes part of my past
When I was leaving care, I was always worried about money. Social services moved me into a B&B where I struggled and lived on pot noodles and pasties for months. B&Bs are temporary, they shouldn't be considered a home.
Throughout my battles with mental health issues, I feel like I have been passed on again and again - someone else's problem. Social services just told me to visit the doctor, one worker gave me the number for the Samaritans, that was all. Mental health issues affect many young people leaving care but it seems that we don't deserve specialised support services.
When I left care, I was placed in B&Bs. Sometimes they would book up or you'd be kicked out for behavior and find yourself living on the streets. I was 16 the first time this happened. You wouldn't treat your own kids like this, so why treat someone else's' this way.
This is city park in Bradford. We meet people here and relax. We see a lot of things here like drums and bands. I've made friends here.
This is where I meet my friends. My friends are my family, and I'm glad I live with them. We cook together and hang out at home. The government should give us options of where we can live.
The colours of the leaf stand out like I do. This is how it feels when you have care experience. CAMHS is postive but we need more mental health support.
Stop ignoring young people's voices. I've had four social workers and two or three leaving care workers. It wasn't consistent. Listen and let young people know about changes to their support.
When you get into the care system, it feels like you're losing everyone. I asked my social worker to arrange therapy but she didn't. Therapy should be available to those who need it.
I was 12 when I was transferred to a secure unit. I'm from Bradford and they placed me in Bristol. It felt like I had to start all over again. It was good to get a fresh start, but I didn't have a say in it and I should have.
I've grown up too quick for my age due to my experiences. I've struggles wth who to trust. If you are working wth someone with care experience, don't paint on fake words. Be honest.
I'm studying English at college. It's important because I've lived here 12 months. I have good teachers and good friends who help me so I can learn and then get a job.
I go here to smoke cigarettes with myself and think about the future. When I came to the U.K 12 months ago, I couldn't speak any English. You have to learn the language before thinking about work. If you try hard, you can achieve anything you want to achieve
He's my best friend and I hope I have him forever. If you have friends you can do anything. In the 12 months I've been in this country, I've been working on my English and tignya which my friend speaks.
Social workers can be a barrier to seeing your loved ones. I was meant to have supervised contact with my mum and sister every month, but we had to wait 9 weeks. This made me feel more low than I can describe. It needs sorting out.
Communication can stop confusion. We need more clear information.
Having a social worker involved means I have appointments and things standing in the way. I love my social worker but I'm looking forward to a more normal life with a job and kids. It's going to get better. The sky will be less grey.
A lot of social workers will say they will do something your way and then they don't do it. Some social workers help you and some don't. I would like social workers to help us.
Be the light in someone's darkness. When you're in care you feel better if there is someone to rely on that will listen.
A lot of people don't know how to speak English quickly. It's helpful as a refugee to live with a family who will help you learn and improve your English.
This picture makes me feel happy. In summer time peope paddle. I like the nature in the UK. I'm happy to be here.
When you're 17, you get money every week but when you're 18 and you live alone, you get £240 a month and that's really hard to live on. You need one person to explain how to manage your money before you turn 18. I think a lot of 18 year olds will struggle with this.
I enjoy it here. It helps me to stop stressing. Sometime I come here with my family who I've iived with nearly one year since I moved here as a refugee from Eritrea. They've helped me with my English and homework. I really love my family.
A lot of refugees are living alone here and they must need help. They will worry about family back home. You need people to help you for the future.
There are ups and downs for foster children. I have extra challenges because I have ADHD. It's difficult to be nice, stay calm and make friends.
Sometimes I feel alone. There's a lot of bullying at school. I've joined a group to help stand up to the bullies. It's important to stand up for yourself no matter what.
This fish is called 'The Living Dead' because it died and came back to life. My brother died when he was a baby, but no matter what your family still loves you.
School's should pay more attention to personal issues and offer support for students in trouble. I want to be better at school but I'm not supported. You can't change the past but the future will be bright like the morning sky.
We deserve better. We deserve to be happy.
I have a clear mindset but my social worker assumes I need extra help. Listen to what we say.
Education is important, it's harder to go to school when you have other things going on, but keep going. You ned a lot of activities to stay out of trouble.
You have to work in life, in order to have a good life you need a house, and to get the house you need money. Don't think because you're in care you're going to have things given to you.
Everybody hurts sometimes, everybody hurts someday.
Children in Care Council makes things better like the light through the trees. We meet on Wednesdays to talk about all sorts of things to do with care. It's about getting our voice heard. I love the way we're in charge.
Everyone has a different story. We are unique. Other people at school make assumptions if they know you have care experience so I usually keep my experiences to myself. It would be better if there was no judgement.
You need a good social worker. This work is important. If social workers tell you what they can do and what they can't do, then you can make a plan. Honesty is important.
The petals fall like people do, but you need to get back up and keep your head high.
Problems come and go like the clouds but things can stay on paperwork a long time. They should listen more and write less.
I'm 13 and I've had a lot of social workers. If I could give them a piece of advice it would be to not make empty promises. I ask them to arrange contact, they promise they will and they don't. It makes me feel very anxious.
Sometimes it’s better just to have peace and quiet and sometimes it’s good to have people worry about you because it shows that they care. Not all care experienced young people are the same.
I’ve been painting as long as I can remember and it makes me feel better when times are hard.
When I have to move foster placements, it makes me feel sad and because I don’t want to feel sad I bury my emotions. I might need to leave this foster placement soon which worries me. If we could have more say in who we live with and meet them ahead of moving in, it would make things easier.
With school you can't tell anyone about your care experience because they'll make fun of you. In the Compass group, I feel calm because I know that others in the group won’t tell anyone about it because they're in the exact same position.
If foster carers are meant to be a parental figure, they should be able to make decisions. Even to go to a friend’s house, there's a long process involving phone calls and DBS checks. It's only going to a friends house but it feels exaggerated and a longer process than it is for others.
The red building is the care system because it's too solid to break through. I feel like the tree, weak and stuck between my past and the care system. I want to be able to go back to my original family but it's important to look forward.
It’s difficult having to go through a lot a young age. I have a really good social worker that listens to me and helps me get my point across. People can be patronising which is the antithesis of fun. We should be heard and listened to regarding our experiences.
It’s helpful to have check-ins about how you are doing in life and how you’re feeling. When you build a relationship it’s easier to talk about things, as when there’s judgement it’s harder to share how you feel.
I have a lot of positive energy. I go to cadets twice a week and learn drills. It’s a chance to go out and talk to people. It’s important to have opportunities for young people.
Care leavers can't just get a house and at the last minute suddenly become independent. I've had to be prepared beforehand as I care about my transition and take full responsibility. I advise all care leavers to do the same so they can make the most of their flat.
The prayer mat and Quran is my path to life. If I'm ever pulled to a wrong destination, I know where to jump on board to be on the right track. My religion, Islam, gives me peace, clarity and a sense of purpose.
I do a lot of advocacy work for my borough. The fist represents taking action and the lightbulb represents our voices being heard at CICC. Advocacy should be available and advertised for all care leavers if they want to be involved. All boroughs should open doors for this.
When you have experience with care, there's a lot of people involved. When there's so many people to speak to it can become confusing. I've had five social workers in total but it would have been easier if I could have stuck with one. Then I'd know who to turn to.
Only half of me is in this place. The rest remains in that desert without water. Those days and nights at sea. Inside the stomach of this ice-cold truck. Those unfamiliar miles I travelled are more than a journey. Not a voracious appetite for things.
Local authorities should provide more awareness on what advocate support is available to young people. These documents need to be clearly set out in one documents from their entitlements to support the different transitioning they will be going through from adulthood and independence. Most parents continue to support their children into adulthood and as a corporate parent, the local authority should want the best for their young people.
Maybe home is nothing but two arms holding you tight when you’re at your worst” - Yara Bashraheel Looking forward to the time when you have your own home, freedom and belonging. It’s yours, it’s not shared, it’s not temporary.
A whole new world – Is it a priority now? COVID 19 has brought uncertainty, a loss of control and a fear and anxiety of socialising to many - the young, old, rich, poor, the vulnerable who woke up one day and everything they were sure of is now uncertain. ‘Oh the irony’. So many care-experienced young people are no strangers to isolation - this is already their everyday reality. So, is mental health a priority now?
You are not alone. It’s about knowing what you entitlements are.
Strong, resilient, courageous, Patient and independent, Fragile but abundant, vigorous. Moving around is part of being in care, it can be exhausting but remember a home is not defined by a place and you can make even temporary places work for you.
"The experience of young people who arrive in the UK can be different compare to those who are born in the UK. As they navigate the language, legal papers and finding support, they are likely to feel there are losing their identity. Professionals working closely with them need to strike the balance of supporting the young people to integrate whilst also respecting the individual’s culture identity and supporting them to stay connected to it all. Professionals must understand the needs and wants of unaccompanied minors on a deeper level."
Find support from your social worker and make sure you understand what you need to do and what they are responsible for. Hold them to account. It is your right.
Life is not a bed of roses, however you can avoid the thorns by seeking and shouting for help whenever you need it and while you are in the system, check what your rights are.
"When I left the residential home I was living in at 18, the relationships I had made with staff and residents stopped, just like that. No one stayed in contact, the only record of my time in care, written in my care files. It felt like I no longer existed to all those people who looked after me in homes and foster homes. My past relationships felt erased and I felt irrelevant. Part of me still does. Continued support for care leavers is essential. Care should not stop into adulthood. It should not stop at all."
Find the beauty in the wildness and chaos. Do something you love. Reading, craft, sport... whatever brings you happiness.
"It can feel very difficult, lonely and daunting when you first leave care. With the right support from friends, social workers and care-leaving teams you can begin to find your way. Life goes on and can be full of new, exciting opportunities and experiences. I found the structure and routine of university helped to give me purpose, and going to watch live music at the pub helped me to feel alive, have fun and be connected. Find your passion. Be your own advocate and ask for help."
The outside world may seem rough and spikey but there is someone out there that will help you. Find a home inside yourself - insist on mental health support long term.
It's difficult to transition, but like a bird that finds its nest in a place that is rough, you can find a home in yourself and outside in the world.
"When I lived in residential and foster homes, the staff and families had no idea of what I had suffered. They were unable to help or understand the trauma. This meant that I felt alone and scared. They think that you are attention seeking or bad rather than being able to look beyond that. Attachment theory is evidence based and is a crucial part of working with looked after children and young people. Training is not a choice. Its essential. Fund professional evidence-based training now. "
Take one step at a time as the future is unknown and not a straight, clear path, however you can always see/look to the horizon. We can always try and seek beauty around us in dark times.
"The room you're in can feel like it's closing in on you and the darkness might swallow you up. Going for a walk and being in nature can help bring you back to a positive place. My teenage years felt suffocating but I managed to get mental health support later in life and I found my light. There is always some light shining in on the darkness. Find yours."
"When I first went into care aged 9 with my brothers. There was no one who looked like us. We were made to wear indian clothes and eat indian food which made us feel even worse than we already did. We just wanted to fit in. We were subjected to racist abuse and no one seemed to understand. Don't tell us what we should do to keep hold of our culture. Ask us. Leave the door open for us by suggesting activities and clubs that support our culture when WE are ready. Love and security come first, perhaps after that you can support us to think about where we feel we might belong. The right family might not be from the same culture as us. Listen to us."
"Going to university and even though they had full parental responsibility, the local authority wouldn't pay for my accomodation after university if I chose one outside London. It felt that my choice was taken away. I was worried that I would be made homeless when I returned, so I stayed in my flat which meant I missed out on social experiences. It meant I had to go to university in London. Game Over. No one should have to make the choice between a full university experience or homelessness. It's not actually a choice."
I have a clear mindset but my social worker assumes I need extra help. Listen to what we say.
Everyone has a different story. We are unique. Other people at school make assumptions if they know you have care experience so I usually keep my experiences to myself. It would be better if there was no judgement.